Dependence is not
a word that gets much love these days. It’s cousin independence? That’s who
gets the press.
Our culture loudly
esteems independence as a noble quality. To be strong and valuable is to be
able to stand on our own without help from anyone else. But, within that
mindset, we overlook independence’s downfall – estrangement from connection.
“One of the
greatest barriers to connection is the cultural importance we place on going it
alone. Somehow we’ve come to equate success with not needing anyone.”
- Brene Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection
The truth is –
I’ve fallen prey to that trap. I’ve seen myself adopt the mentality that I need
to prove to myself and to others that I can do this thing called life on my
own.
Yet, I’ve quickly
found that’s total B.S. I do need others. I can’t do this alone. My darkest
days are those where I try to do everything myself and keep life within the
narrow bounds of my own control.
The best days?
They’re marked by dependence and being vulnerable enough to trust others and
journey closely with them.
So, I believe it’s
high time we knock independence off its cultural throne and start praising the
sort of dependence that cultivates connection.
[photo: maui]
